#SOL18

When we clear the physical clutter from our lives, we literally make way for inspiration and ‘good, orderly direction’ to enter. ~ Julia Cameron

It is the first Tuesday in February – time to check in on my One Little Word progress.  The word I choose was declutter. As I reread my post from January 2nd, I see that I had some rather lofty goals about decluttering my life!  Well, I guess you can say I am taking baby steps.

So far I have donated two trash bags full of clothing to the Big Brother, Big Sisters organization.  There are plenty more clothes in my attic and bedroom closets waiting to find a new home. I have learned that I cannot wait until an organization contacts me about a donation.  I must spend some time each week going through clothes and household items and start collecting way ahead of time.  This way I will be good to go when I get the call and not scrambling at the last minute.

I also donated a trash bag of old towels to an animal rescue collection being done by the daughter of a colleague.  I had a large laundry basket filled with these “rags” that we were going to use for house cleaning and washing the cars.  I didn’t give them all away, but come on, just how much cleaning does a person really do that would warrant saving that many towels?

Most recently, I cancelled the daily paper.  While this decision was based on the amount of papers we recycle each week as well as the cost, I am a little sad.  I do like to hold that paper in my hand and read about the local news and of course the obituaries.  I know I can get the same news online, but I have been reading the paper since I was a young girl and my brother was a newspaper carrier of the Philadelphia Evening Bulletin.  In reality, I “read” very little of the paper and “skim” the rest.  It has to go.

I have been less successful with decluttering my personal life and use of social media, but no worries I still have eleven months to go!

 #SOL18

Clutter is nothing more than postponed decisions. ~Unknown.

One little word – that’s all I have been hearing about lately.  I have chosen words in the past – inspiration – balance are a couple I can remember off hand.  I just never saw ads for making your word into a bracelet, or a necklace, but I like it.  I would order myself one except it would go against the word I have chosen for 2018 – declutter.

I debated between organization and declutter.  In a way, I thought they were very much alike, however you can organize your clutter, and that doesn’t help me in my ultimate goal to simplify life.  

Just what needs decluttering in my life?  Well there are the obvious areas – my house (drawers, closets, files), my classroom (closets, file drawers, my desk), the attic (decorations, mementos, baby clothes and toys – my kids are 32 and 36).  

If you dig deeper you will see that I also need to declutter my use of social media.  I could be so much more productive if I wasn’t addicted to scrolling through Facebook, Twitter, checking email, or playing Candy Crush. Social media itself isn’t a bad thing – only when it takes over time that could be better spent on other things….like decluttering my house etc.   Seriously though, I could be reading or writing, or resting, or catching up with friends; I could have a lot more free time if I could keep my index finger off my devices.

The hardest thing to declutter will be saying goodbye to the people who take so much of my time and energy.  I am talking about those people who rope me into situations that really have nothing to do with me, situations that I have no control over, and situations that just cause me stress.  I am naturally a people pleaser, and I generally am interested in other people and don’t mind being a sounding board.  Yet, it’s time to pick and choose what takes my precious time and energy because I have learned as I have gotten older there is only a limited supply of each of them.

In order to declutter, I need to stop postponing decisions.  Touch a paper once and either file it, recycle or shred.  Limit my online time to certain times during the day. Learn how to say no to people and situations that drain my time and energy.  Making decisions won’t be easy for me, but it should produce my desired results – a simpler, decluttered life.  

It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences.  Audre Lorde

Recently, my class finished reading Refugee by Alan Gratz.  One of my students came to me and told me that his friend’s abuela was a Cuban refugee and could we ask her to come and speak to our class.  I thought it was a wonderful idea.  

Today was the day that Rosario came to talk to my classes.  Forty 7th graders sat with rapt attention as she described her life in Cuba before Fidel Castro’s takeover and after and the circumstances surrounding her leaving Havana and coming to the US. She also explained to the students the difficulties she faced in the US as well as the good things in her life here as a Cuban-American.  The students had a Q & A session with her after her talk.  They learned a great deal about the trials and tribulations of having to leave your homeland.

Looking over my notes from this afternoon, three things Rosario said really struck me.

First, when asked what her greatest challenges were she said, “Learning English (because she wasn’t the greatest English student in Cuba) and realizing that her life would never be the same again.” She described the scene of her mother and father taking her to the airport to fly to Miami and live with her uncle and looking out the back of the car window and watching the house she grew up in disappear as she drove away.  I cannot even imagine. I haven’t had to leave my childhood home for a new land, but there have definitely been those moments in my life when I knew life as I knew it would never be the same.

After leaving Cuba, Rosario lived in Miami, Michigan, Illinois, Ohio, and then finally Pennsylvania. One student asked which was her favorite place.  Rosario replied, “Every place you are leaves something in your heart.” Again, I have never lived any place but Pennsylvania, but I feel that every class I have ever taught has left something in my heart that makes me who I am today.

Rosario has traveled extensively throughout the world.  She ended her talk by encouraging the students to travel as much as they could because “You can see how different people are, but when you talk to them they all want the same thing.”

Isn’t that the truth?!

No beauty shines better than that of a good heart. ~Kapten and son

This has been the longest week of my life.  

Last Monday, my husband, Chuck went for a stress test as a follow up to his overnight stay at the hospital a couple of weeks ago.  The doctor called around 5:00 saying they saw a shadow on one of his tests and would like him to come in for a heart catheterization.  

I left for work on Tuesday morning expecting him to schedule the test in the upcoming week, and I would take the day off and go with him.  Well my little chihuahua likes to do things quickly!  I get a phone call at work at 8:15 telling me he going to the hospital by 9:00 to get the test. He said,”Don’t worry, I just need a ride home.” Yeah right!

Of course there was not a sub to be found, but I work with the most awesome group of teachers.  My colleagues gave up their prep times to cover my classes, so that I could leave and go to the hospital.

Honestly, I think that the worst we were expecting was that maybe he would need a stent or two put in.  Can I tell you that I almost fell off my seat when the cardiologist told us that Chuck needed quadruple bypass surgery!?! They wanted us to go home and make an appointment to see the surgeon, but that was not sitting well with my “let’s get it done” husband.  Chuck requested to see the surgeon before leaving the hospital.  One thing led to another and before you know it surgery was scheduled for Friday morning.  

The wait from Wednesday to Friday was interminable.  The surgeon gave Chuck a good prognosis, but there is no stopping your mind from wandering to dark places.  

We joke and laugh a lot, so that seemed to be the best way to handle this situation if we could.  I told him that Friday was the first day of Autumn – my favorite day of the year,  and he had better not ruin it for me!  I also told him if he saw any white lights during surgery not to go towards them. Some people thought that was terrible; he laughed.  He knew I was just doing my best to keep the situation light and not have a total and complete meltdown! We also had our serious quiet moments “just in case.”

Seeing Chuck being rolled away to the operating room was frightening.  I could see the fear in his eyes, and that is not something I am use to seeing from my “rock”. Each good update made me feel a little more relaxed, but it wasn’t until I saw him open his eyes just before midnight that I felt like I could really breathe. Of course in his joking way – the first words out of his mouth when he saw me were, “Ew – a nightmare!”

He is doing well, but we have a long road ahead.  I am just feeling so blessed that we got this second chance at life, because his heart was just a time bomb waiting to explode.  Like everything else that has come our way, we’ll take on this journey together, because after all, two hearts are better than one.

If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you. — A. A. Milne

My husband has been out of work since the beginning of June.  In July he was fortunate enough to get some part time work which we hope will develop into a full time position. Needless to say, we spent a great deal of “quality time” together this summer that we don’t ordinarily get to have.  While we didn’t get to go on a real vacation since money was tight, we found other ways to entertain ourselves.  We got some things done around the house the have been on the “to do” list for quite a while, we watched one too many Lifetime movies, and we laughed a lot.

Chuck and I are high school sweethearts.  We have been together almost 44 years – 37 of them married. I really didn’t think it was possible to feel any closer to him than I already did, but this summer we reconnected on another level.  

Then this past weekend the bond grew even stronger. We had a little health scare.  Chuck felt some tightness in his chest (the result of an uncooperative lawnmower), so we made a trip to the ER. Luckily all his tests came back normal.  They kept him overnight for observation, but he got sprung on Sunday.  

This was a wake-up call, and now we are on the “straight and narrow” path to healthy living; we’ve been down that path a time or two already!  We are getting too old to play games with our health. Our luck will eventually run out.  

All I know is that the past four months or so have cemented what I have always felt since the day I met Chuck – I want my hourglass to run out before his, because I cannot imagine living a day without him.

It seems to me of great importance to teach children respect for life. ~ Eleanor Roosevelt.

I will never understand how one person can kill another. This has weighed heavily on me since the disappearance of four young Bucks County men (ages 18-22) and the subsequent discovery of their remains. I did not know any of these men or their families personally, but it did not stop me from shedding a few tears.

By now this story has been splashed across national news – mystery murder in bucolic Bucks County PA. A 20-year-old man and his cousin lured each victim to a secluded farm in Solebury township. I will spare you the gory details, but they can be found on local Philadelphia television channel websites. Each of these young men thought they were going to buy some marijuana. Each met with their demise.

For over a week now details have emerged in news outlets and on Facebook. I don’t know what is more troubling – the timetable of terrible details or the comment threads. People have taken it upon themselves to be judge and jury. Since the men were buying marijuana they have been made out to be drug dealers and derelicts who “got what they deserved.”

As I said, I didn’t know these victims. It is easy to second guess and conjecture, but I subscribe to the “Let ye who is without sin cast the first stone” philosophy. What I do know is that each of them made a poor choice that led to unimaginable consequences. What I do know is that they were sons, grandsons, brothers, nephews, friends. They did not deserve to die for making a poor choice no matter what some self-proclaimed Facebook guru spouts out.

How do we reach our young people? How do we get them to realize that this life we move through each day is not a video game. People kill! They use guns and knives, drugs and words, but is ultimately people killing each other.