Gerbil on a Wheel

~ rdicarne ~ 3 Comments

sol#SOL17  Day 15

Beware the barrenness of a busy life. ~Socrates

Today I am feeling like a frustrated gerbil on the wheel.

  1. My cul-de-sac was not plowed out yesterday.  I thought the township would have plows working all night, so when I woke up this morning and saw untouched snow gracing the end of my driveway I was angry.  That meant that I was not going to be able to get my Honda Accord out of the driveway.  My husband had to drive me to work, and my sister-in-law had to pick me up.  I really hate not being able to be independent.
  2. We had a two-hour delay which shortens all classes to 35 minutes.  Ugh!  I had a test scheduled, and I really needed to get it in before we begin standardized testing on Friday.
  3. Speaking of standardized testing, I also need to get in another practice test before Monday which meant it needed to be today or tomorrow.  Great – Thursday I have a double period. That will work right?  Wrong!  I forgot that several of my students were going on a Model UN trip on Thursday, so I had to find time to get it in today. Just where will I find that time?
  4. With snow on the ground, we had indoor recess, which means I had to stay in with my class.  I felt like I had about 10 minutes for lunch, although it was actually 30. I didn’t have time to eat my orange though.
  5. Today was report card day.  Usually our principal distributes the report cards to each student, but due to the schedule change he was not going to be able to do it.  We were to give them out at the end of the day.  I almost forgot.
  6. I got home to a few voice mail messages.  I returned a call to the insurance company.  I knew that they probably wouldn’t talk to me about my husband’s insurance, but I gave it a try anyway.  Shot down.  I will put that on my list for tomorrow.
  7. I have a broken tooth.  I wanted to call the dentist today and try to get an appointment, but that did not happen.  I hope I remember to call tomorrow, so that I get appointment before I break any more of it.  Thank goodness it is a back tooth.

My day was not bad.  I definitely have had worse.  It was just too crowded!

Snow Day Sounds

~ rdicarne ~ 5 Comments

 

sol#SOL17 Day 14

A snow day literally and figuratively falls from the sky, unbidden, and seems like a thing of wonder. ~ Susan Orlean

Hear the wind whipping
The sleet slamming against the bedroom window
Snowstorms should be quiet

As day breaks there is silence
Just snow falling, no alarm clocks ringing,
No whispers of showers, no hustle, no bustle

Soon the voices of newscasters fill the air
Reporting from near and far
The heater clicks on and off with greater frequency

Later the sounds of shovels scraping the blacktop
Combine with humming snow blowers and car motors
Reverberating through the neighborhood

The house begins to crackle and creak
As the sun makes a short appearance
Crunching boots resound through the frozen precipitation

Spoons stirring in cups of hot cocoa
Sputtering popcorn jumps into the bowl
It’s good to be home on a day like today

 

Do You Want to Build a Snowman?

~ rdicarne ~ 2 Comments

sol#SOL17 Day13

When snow falls, nature listens. ~ Antoinette Van Kleeff

Do you want to build a snowman?  I left school almost giddy today.  As Winter Storm Stella bears down on the northeast, I am already planning my snow day.

  • No alarm to set
  • Look out the window
  • Spend time with my husband who will also be home
  • Look out the window
  • Watch daytime TV (as long as we don’t lose power)
  • Look out the window
  • Read the book that I haven’t had time to read
  • Look out the window
  • Nap
  • Look out the window
  • Watch the latest storm report
  • Look out the window
  • Brew a cup of tea
  • Look out the window
  • Eat one of the many snacks hubby bought for our confinement
  • Look out the window
  • Write in my notebook
  • Look out the window
  • Check Facebook
  • Look out the window
  • Call my kids to see who has the higher snowfall totals
  • Look out the window

We already got word that we will be off tomorrow, so there will be no alarm setting tonight! So I guess I can stay up until I see that firsts flake fall.  I know that if tomorrow is anything like past snow days, I will spend most of my day looking out the window. What does your perfect snow day look like?

 

 

Feeling Helpless

~ rdicarne ~ 5 Comments

sol#SOL Day 12    

 

This past Friday marks two weeks since I received a tearful phone call from my best friend’s daughter telling me that her dad had suffered cardiac arrest, and they weren’t sure if he would make it through the night. The fabulous medical staff was keeping him alive with a special machine called an ECMO.

That call set off a chain of phone calls.  First to our pastor, and then to the women in our book club.  The ten of us have been together for the past 13 years, and have experienced a variety of life events together. But nothing prepared us for this. We began to storm the heavens with prayers and wait to hear good news.

Over these past two weeks I have only spoken to my friend, Robyn once by phone, a few times by text.  Her journey is unimaginable.  For every step forward they take two steps back.  Her husband of nearly 40 years is in the fight of his life, in a drug-induced coma, unable to communicate with his family. Robyn is a strong woman, whose strength is being tested beyond belief.

Robyn and I have been friends for over 25 years.  We worked across the hall from each other for 20 years.  As our friendship grew, we talked every morning before school began, sharing almost everything. We talked about our husbands, and children, life events – happy and sad.  We shared our feelings and fears, joys and accomplishments. We were each other’s therapists.

We still work together, but are not across the hall, so we have to make a point to see each other and keep up with the news of our families. Robyn is always the first one I want to share good news with or ask for advice when I am struggling with a situation. She knows just what to say.  She is good at helping me put things into perspective, as I hope I am for her.

Right now I feel helpless.  I want to talk to Robyn, help her somehow through this ordeal, but that’s not what she needs.  She needs me to be here when she is ready to talk.  I want to respect her wishes.  She just can’t rehash every day’s details even though so many of us want to know how her husband is doing – how she is doing.  I text her every couple of days with an inspirational picture/quote just to let her know that I am thinking of her.  She knows even without the text, but I need to do something.

All I can do is pray. I think about Robyn all the time, every day. I send good thoughts her way, and keep the women in our book club updated, and we pray.  I want to do more, but I pray.

 

 

Just What I Needed

~ rdicarne ~ 2 Comments

sol#SOL17 Day 11

We may not be rich, but our grandchildren are priceless. ~ Unknown

Ok, so I have been staring at this page on and off all day, and the only reason I am typing at all is that I am afraid that I will fall asleep and not post today, and I will be a slicer failure.

My grandson came to visit tonight, and he brought his mom and dad.  Parker is a talker.  From the time he gets up until he goes to bed he is talking.  If he is not telling the closest adult something very important, he is playing and making up stories – the adventures of his Duplo people, or his latest favorite stuffed animal.  He has quite the imagination for a three-year-old and a vocabulary to go with it.  He never ceases to amaze me.

I love watching him play and interact with whoever will listen, but the best part of the evening was when we snuggled on the couch. You just can’t get those moments back.

 

TGIF

~ rdicarne ~ 1 Comment

sol#SOL17 Day 10

Give without remembering, Take without forgetting. ~Elizabeth Bibesco

Friday. It seemed so far away. I had so much to get finished, and I wasn’t sure I would be successful. Now here it is, and I am happy to say that I have cleared my desk, and came home with no “must do’s” on my list.

I am thankful this week is over, but I am thankful for so many things this week.

  • Grades closed today, and all my grading is finished
  •  My colleagues have taken such good care of me while I am tethered to this walker – running off my papers, taking my class to and from lunch, anything I need.
  • My husband has been picking up all the slack at home since I am virtually useless.
  • Speaking of my husband – have I said how thankful I am that he is so happy in his new job?
  • Dinner with my brother, sister-in-law, and their family was such a treat.
  • Seeing my mom so happy in her assisted living community.
  • My checkbook balanced!

TGIF! I will spend the weekend appreciating each and every moment that I get to enjoy outside of school, so that I will be ready to face the week on Monday.

 

Grading Overload

~ rdicarne ~ Leave a comment

sol #SOL17 Day 9

“In the best classrooms, grades are only one of many types of feedback provided to students.” ~Douglas B. Reeves

It is the end of the trimester; grades close tomorrow.  I have been a grading machine for the past week.  Just when I thought I was all caught up, I realized that I was missing a few grades for a couple of students.  Ughh!!

First, there is the student who was absent for a week and is in the process of making up missed tests.  OK, she only has one more to take tomorrow.

Next, there are the students who missed a test; took it when they returned to school, and the test is nowhere to be found! Grrr….lucky I recorded the grades on the grading sheet….still can’t find the tests.

Lastly, is the one that got away.  I worked my way through 46 multi-genre projects only to find that number 47 was missing – never turned on February 23rd with the rest of the papers.  But did he say he hadn’t turned it in?!? No, that would make it too easy for me.  I KNOW I told the class that if they weren’t putting their project in the pile they should see me.  So much for following directions.

All I have left to do tomorrow is grade three late tests and complete personal & social growth, and effort & study skills – oh and all the skill checks in ELA.  I am going to try and go in early (if the snow doesn’t slow me down) and work.  I will work through lunch and after school if I have too, but I am NOT going to be grading at home this weekend!  I want a weekend off!

 

All Mixed Up

~ rdicarne ~ 5 Comments

sol #SOL17 Day8

Weather is a great metaphor for life — sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s bad, and there’s nothing much you can do about it but carry an umbrella or choose to dance in the rain! ~Terri Guillemets,

The weather has me all mixed up. Meteorology speaking it is winter, and spring is right around the corner, but somebody better tell the weather that!

One day the temperature reaches 60 degrees then dips to 30 the next morning. I don’t know how to dress. Will a sweater be too hot? Maybe I should dress in layers. Clothes are everywhere in my bedroom because I am afraid to put away the winter clothes, but I am starting to pull out some cooler weather wear. The comforter goes on, the comforter comes off, the socks go on the socks come off. It is the dance that goes on all night long.

Is it going to rain or maybe snow? My knees and hands can tell you so. I don’t have to watch the nightly news to know that I need to break out the anti-inflammatories. The next day my sinuses and dizzy feeling in my head let me know that the barometric pressure is on the move. I carry a virtual medicine cabinet everyday so that I am prepared for whatever Mother Nature has in store for me.

I can’t wait for the weather to make up its mind. Let it be Spring already. Then I can pack up my winter clothes and break out the allergy meds!

Expectations Be Gone!

~ rdicarne ~ 3 Comments

sol#SOL17

When you release your expectations, you are free to enjoy things for what they are instead of what you think they should be. ~Mandy Hale

I have been using the walker for just about two weeks now, and will be using it until at least March 17th. I have learned a lot about myself over these last couple of weeks.

Having to use this walker makes everything more of a challenge. I try my best to think ahead and know what I want and what I need to get before I go into another room. I have learned that before now I must have gone up and down my hallway from my bedroom to the bathroom at least ten times a morning. Now I try to make that trip just twice – once to get into the shower and once to hang up my robe, brush my teeth, and spray my hair.

Having to use the walker makes simple tasks like bringing the mail in from outside or retrieving the newspaper much more difficult. Getting breakfast, making lunch, packing up my school bag all take so much more time.

I have learned that even though I often put off doing household chores, now that I can’t do some of them I am frustrated. Who would have thought that I would miss dusting or vacuuming?

It has only been five weeks since I first felt the pain of my pelvic fracture. From everything I have read it takes at least six weeks to three months to heal from this type of fracture, but waiting is so difficult. I have learned that I am impatient, and I think that I should be feeling better than I am feeling. Instead of taking one day at a time, I am fretting about whether or not I will be able to be pain free by March 17th. If I’m not I will have to stay on the walker.

This experience is opening my eyes to the difficulty that people with disabilities face each and every day. While this is definitely hard for me, and I have the right to any feelings that I am having right now, I can at least see a light at the end of the tunnel unlike those who have no chance of leaving their walkers behind.

I do my best to be upbeat when colleagues inquire about how it is going, but I need to be upbeat with myself. This challenge is slowing me down, making me stop doing some things, and I need to learn how to embrace the moment and let go of what I can’t control. I need to stop expecting and just experience.

Frustration

~ rdicarne ~ 5 Comments

sol#SOL17 Day 6

Sometimes I get to the point of frustration, that I just fall silent. ~ Unknown.

I love technology when it works. Tonight after dinner I got myself all set up at the dining room table with my new laptop. For some reason I could not get on the Internet. I was having a little trouble last night before I finally got my piece posted and chalked the problem up to the Internet itself.

Unfortunately, tonight I still couldn’t get my laptop to cooperate. Now I am frustrated not only because I can’t figure out why the circle just keeps spinning and spinning but not allowing me to get online, but I now have to write my post on my iPad.

While I love my iPad, there are just some things that are best left to the computer, and my daily post is one of them. Is that silly? Maybe, but that’s how I roll.

Well I can’t say that I have writer’s block, I just am too frustrated to have coherent thoughts find their way from my brain to the page.

Tomorrow is a new day!