It’s not what I thought I would write about tonight, but here I am. I don’t understand why some people are so mean. Someone I love is hurting because someone has hurt them.

Family relationships are tricky, to say the least, but family is family, and you only get one. I tell my 7th-graders that they don’t have to “like” everyone, but they must “love” everyone. Loving someone means you respect their choices even if you disagree with them. Loving someone means not making them live up to some preconceived notions you have about how a relationship should look. Loving someone means not trying to change who they are.

All relationships have ebbs and flows, ups and downs, but if the relationship is important to you, you try your best to make it work. However, trying to make it work cannot be one-sided forever. You get to the point when the hurt becomes too much, and it seems as though nothing will change. That’s when you need to acknowledge that this relationship is taking up more bandwidth than you have to give, and it is okay to take a break or break the chains that are weighing you down. Stop asking “why” and start focusing your energy on those who love and support you unconditionally.

Remember, every person is worthy of love and respect. Words can hurt. Actions can hurt. Exclusion can hurt. Think first.