May has arrived, bringing a specific memory of Chuck and a smile to my face. Chuck’s birthday is May 17th; he would have been 70 this year. Chuck loved his birthday. Once May 1st hit, he began the countdown to his birthday with childlike exuberance.
We would always spend a weekend in Atlantic City, NJ, to celebrate, and by now, Chuck would have called his casino host at the Golden Nugget to book a room, hoping she would upgrade us to a suite for his birthday. Next, he would create an itinerary in his head and share it with me several times.
His list included:
- What time would we leave on Friday (I had to be sure to be ready to go as soon as I got home from school)
- What offers he was getting from the casino (free play money, birthday money, food comps)
- where we would eat each day of the trip
- how much money we would bring to gamble
- What snacks he would be packing (He never went anywhere without water and snacks in a cooler bag. You never knew when they would come in handy.)
- what time we would leave AC to come home on Sunday
I didn’t always have the capacity to share in his excitement until it got closer to the actual day of departure, but watching his genuine joy made me so happy (even when I was hearing it for the umpteenth time and wasn’t quite listening as intently as he expected).
There will not be a casino trip this year; in fact, I haven’t been to a casino since our last trip together last August. I don’t know if or when I will visit a casino because it was so much of a “we” thing rather than a “me” thing, but the memories of our casino adventures bring me more happiness than sadness. For that, I am grateful.
Rita DiCarne 
Rita, it was fun to get to know Chuck a little better through your post, and his exuberant celebration of his birthday. So sweet. I love your post, especially the concluding sentences, “…memories of our casino adventures bring me more happiness than sadness. For that, I am grateful.” That is a great thing to be able to say. Peace.
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Thank you for sharing these thoughts and memories so beautifully. Happiness and sadness mixed together, just as in life – although the happy memories tend to live longer, don’t they. Glad you have so many of these.
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This slice is filled with your love for him. It made me smile. I hope you are able to find a way to celebrate & remember with happiness along with the sorrow. It sounds like he planned fun birthdays!
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Awww, my heart is heavy for you….that grief has a way of sneaking in like a thief in the night and stealing our happiness. What would Chuck want you to do to carry on the tradition in the way that would make you happy? Perhaps a girls’ trip, or a book day somewhere? I’ll bet you will find just the right thing to do!
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Thanks, Kim. I am sure I will figure it out. I still have 12 days! 🙂
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Memories with more happiness than sadness!
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There are so many firsts, but the first birthday — what would’ve been a milestone birthday — without your beloved sounds like it’ll be one of the tougher ones you have to face. Rather than visiting a casino, I’m sure you’ll find a way to honor Chuck on the 17th in a way that makes you feel his presence.
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I am not looking forward to the day, but I will find a way to honor him.
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I enjoyed reading about Chuck’s birthday celebrations. I especially love that he had a mental itinerary for the weekend. Thank you for sharing this joy-filled birthday memory.
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